Forcing my self to sleep, but I can’t. I was lying in bed for like an hour, trying to sleep, trying not to try, but I just wouldn’t fall asleep. My mind was racing but there wasn’t anything I was thinking of. How fucking weird is that? I’ve been staying up really late this past few days doing nothing until I get tired. I over-think. I write. I over-think. I write. This is just exhausting cycle. I make promises. I break them the next day. I don’t know why I just can’t have any self-control…

Why is it so hard for me to not do something, especially when I know I really should? Why do I let it control me instead of I controlling it? I promise tomorrow will be different. I won’t let it take over. I will make the right decisions, I will have self-control.