Now is the time to put words into action. For such a long time, I’ve let people define me: who I am, who I should be. I have my own thoughts and they should be considered important even to just one person: me.

I need not let anyone think that I need to be taken care of. I can take care of myself. As subjective and conceited as it may seem, my life is how I make it. If I choose to bum around and keep myself closed up for the whole world to see, then that’s how I make of it.

For such a long time, I’ve told myself that I will change. Change is not the answer to the difficulty of understanding what I did wrong or why I upset people. No, it’s not. The answer is acceptance to what I’ve done wrong and then moving forward.

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Dad thinks I’ve been going out too much lately. True. But that’s only because he probably got used to the girl who spent 2 years working so hard, then decided to take MBA, rarely partied or went out at night or during the day except if it was on a date with mom, RR or cousins and even then I’d be home by 1am, sometimes even earlier. Yeah, that was pretty much my life for 2 years and as much fun that was, I was practically robbed of my social life. I don’t regret a thing, of course. I still had one of the best times with said people  but I definitely missed out on socializing with different people, with my best friends, with new found friends.

I spent 2 years cooped up in my own little world that I missed out on what a 23 year old girl should experience. Partying all night, having no care in the world, going home late, sleeping when the sun rises and getting up at 4PM, hangovers, meeting boys, etc etc. And so now I’m trying to catch up on all the years I missed out on. I don’t think dad quite understands that. I texted my mom asking for her take on the issue, but she’s been really bitchy and PMS-ing like crazy lately… She wasn’t been more supporting about my new found social life, though. She was the one who was always telling me to explore my options and see what the world has to offer and I wish I listened to her back then. Moms really do know best.

it makes him/her UNCOOPERATIVE right away? 

Fuck! I didn’t know about that… Will you please explain it to me.

Sorry if I don’t want to have breakfast or lunch or merienda with you guys, sorry if I’m not participating in your “bonding” time, sorry if I’m not talking or sharing, coz as far as I know, I can do whatever I want and you’re not supposed to dictate me of what I should be doing or not. 

You could complain if I’m not doing my task and everything, but holy bejeeesuuus, I was trying my best to finish all the projects I’m handling so you guys wont have a hard time when I leave next month. If you’ll also check, I just did a very detailed report for their statutes so you wont bother me in the future. Tell me if its still not enough goddammittt! 

Will you just accept the fact that I’d stop caring and I don’t give a flying fuck anymore, and just get over it? Stop making petty issues. It’s so cheap! Blaaaah